Town Meeting Song Lyrics

Performed by Danny Elfman arid Cast 

JACK 
Listen, there were objects so peculiar
They were not to be believed 
All around, things to tantalise my brain 
It's a world unlike anything I've ever seen 
And as hard as I try
I can't seem to describe
Like a most improbable dream 

But you must believe when I tell you this
It's as real as my skull and it does exist
Here, let me show you

This is a thing called a present
The whole thing starts with a box

DEVIL
A box?
is it steel?

WEREWOLF
Are there locks? 

HARLEOUIN DEMON
Is it filled with a pox?

DEVIL, WEREWOLF, HARLEGUIN DEMON 
A pox
How delightful, a pox

JACK
lf you please 
just a box with bright-colored paper
And the whole thing's topped with a bow 

WITCHES
A bow?
But why?
How ugly
What's in it?
What's in it?

JACK
That's the point of the thing, not to know

CLOWN
It's a bat
Will it bend?

CREATURE UNDER THE STAIRS
lt's a rat
Will it break?

UNDERSEA GAL
Perhaps it s the head that I found in the lake

JACK
Listen now, you don't understand
That's not the point of Christmas land

Now, pay attention
Now we pick up an oversized sock
And hang it like this on the wall

MR. HYDE
Oh, yes! Does it still have a foot?

MEDIUM MR. HYDE
Let me see, let me look

SMALL MR. HYDE
Is it rotted and covered with gook?

JACK
Hmm, let me explain
There's no foot inside, but there's candy
Or sometimes it's filled with small toys

MUMMY AND WINGED DEMON 
Small toys 

WINGED DEMON
Do they bite?

MUMMY
Do they snap?

WINGED DEMON
Or explode in a Sack?

CORPSE KID 
Or perhaps they just spring out 
And scare girls and boys

MAYOR 
What a splendid idea 
This Christmas sounds fun 
Why, I fully endorse it
Let's try it at once

JACK 
Everyone, please now, not so fast
There's something here that you don't quite 
grasp 
Well, I may as well give them what they want 

And the best, I must confess, I have saved for 
the last 
For the ruler of this Christmas land
Is a fearsome king with a deep mighty voice
Least that's what I've come to understand 

And I've also heard it told
That he's something to behold 
Like a lobster, huge and red 
And sets out to slay with his rain gear on
Carting bulging sacks with his big great arms
That is, so I've heard it said

And on a dark, cold night 
Under full moonlight 
He flies into a fog 
Like a vulture in the sky 
And they call him Sandy Claws

Welt, at least they're excited
Though they don't understand
That special kind of feeling in Christmas land
Oh, well...